A person who directly reports to me said, “You want to know what people say…”
It was at that moment that time stopped. I heard a collective gasp in the group, no, the room; no, the state; no, the country. Was she really going to “out” me right here in front of everybody. Was she really going to tell everybody what everybody thought of me. (I didn’t say I was making ANY sense.)
“…people say…”
Hel-lo, did she not just hear that I was better off not knowing people said. Better....meaning more excellent. Happier. Superior feeling.
“If you do your job, you are the best person to work for. You will always have our back. If you…”
Can you please just stop. Ignorance is bliss, and I LOVE being stupid. Ignorance and me…we have a love fest! Two peas in a pod. Peanut butter and jelly. Plain M&M’s in popcorn. (By the way, if you haven’t tried it, you should. Best part of going to a movie.)
“…don’t do your job, they hate working for you.”
Another collective sigh. Well, I thought it was a collective sigh. It was hard to hear from underneath the table. Was it really a sigh or did I just hit my head on the corner, as I crawled underneath?
“Yep….” a colleague, who is another manager, chimed in.
Yep…yep what? Really, you are going to engage in this too?
“…that is exactly what I hear. Not only from employees, but the same is true for those of us who are managers and work with her…”
Hello! I’m right here. Did ANYBODY just hear me say…Ignorance and I—first name basis. Mickey and Minnie. Romeo and Juliet. Johnny and June. Jack and Diane.
“If you do your job, there is no better person to work with. If you don’t do your job, you don’t like working with her.”
Finally, I couldn't take it anymore. I responded, “And, thank you for participating in the new series called—Intervention in the Workplace.”
Everyone laughed.
Why do I do this to myself? Why do I have the little hamster wheel anxiety process in moments like this? Truth is…on some level, I know how others see me. Truth is, I can think of much worse things than, “Do your job, and she has your back.”
In my world, not everyone gets a trophy for showing up. I own that. I might, however, deserve a trophy for the mental gymnastics I do in situations like this. I…go for the Gold!